Whenever I get scared or worried or anxious or depressed or tired or uncomfortable or ill or feel emotions that I do not want to feel at all, I remind myself of things that I enjoy but can’t have at the moment, as it reminds me that I am only human and sometimes humans will not always be happy and want things that we are not allowed to have all the time. Being reminded that I am human makes me feel better. Two days ago I was sat on a bus and it was a very hot day and the bus was very busy because it was late and everyone had finished work and was going home and suddenly there was a wasp on the bus and people started to panic because of the little bug, especially one woman who said loudly that she was allergic to wasps and it was very loud and I was anxious so I started to make a list again. Here is the list.
The colour blue. Televisions. Plug sockets that look like faces. Books on tape. The sound of static. Hypothetical situations. Dogs wearing hats. Spiderman. The sky. The sky. The sky. The sky. The sky. The sky. The sky. Long movies about journeys to unknown lands. Icing sugar. Evaporation. New socks. When I smoked a cigarette. A moonlight bay that I visited once in Spain as a child with my mother and my big brother who said that he was bored and wanted to go exploring but I liked sitting near the end of the bay looking out at the sky the sky the sky and the sea and not being able to see a difference between the colour of the sky and the sea because it was so dark that they were the exact same colour even thought I tried very hard to explain this to him. Equal numbers of pens. Wolves. Myself. BLOCK CAPITALS. Right angles. Leaves. Two and a Half Men. Religious imagery from the 17th century. When magazines have CDs stuck to the front cover. Dice.
An old man hit the wasp with a rolled up copy of The Times and everyone had calmed down.
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